Another old, half-written draft I’m reviving:

The other day was Christmas, and it reminded me of a certain kind of person who chooses their outfits to match the liturgical season. I remember one middle aged woman at a church in Rio who showed up for some feast or other in a red suit, red and white striped blouse, shiny red shoes and matching handbag and hat. It seemed silly to me, and thus began an mildly awkward relationship to dressing. The purple scarf should or should not be worn during Lent? The red handbag on a martyr’s day? A blue dress on a feast of Our Lady?

This led to the memory of all sorts of quirky and charming types one sees in church. I’ve played some of these roles myself at one time or another:

The soprano: Usually middle-aged or even elderly, highly opinionated about music. If allowed in the choir soon drives away most of the rest of the choir with her criticism and temper. If she is ‘merely’ a person in the pews, she still stops by regularly to complain to the music director or the priest about the music. Can be a man or a woman — it’s the attitude that counts.

The introvert: Usually an older teen or young adult, definitely single, maybe should have but didn’t end up in religious life, maybe due to intellectual limitations or lack of social skills. Doesn’t talk much, spends most of Mass wandering around the peripheral areas of the church. Watches part of the action from the upper balconies, hangs out in the choir loft for a bit, later found puttering in the sacristy, sometimes does odd jobs like polishing candlesticks or restacking the hymnals.

The quiet fixture: Usually a very elderly lady, modestly dressed, rarely says a word, nearly always in one of the front pews any time you stop in that church. Best person to ask where the bathrooms are when visiting a new place. Will usually become your favorite auntie if you introduce yourself gently and respectfully.

The ministry fixture: Usually a middle aged woman, dressed in some unusual way that suggests “I have dressed up for church,” while being very different from what anyone else is wearing (ie may be the only woman in creased slacks, blouse, and heels instead of jeans). Walks in with the confidence of someone involved in running things, instead of the usual meandering “where shall I sit today” approach.

The converting couple: A rather awkward and adorable young couple, the girl still showing too much skin for church, the guy may arrive in shorts; holding hands or snuggling during Mass. Easy to engage in cheerful conversation. Not yet cynical.

The pious child: I tend to notice this more in boys, but now and again there’s a child of 5 or 8 or 12 who is just utterly engaged with God, and fully aware and prayerful, and it is the most precious thing.

The high-energy toddler: Usually this one is particularly agitated during the sermon and the Consecration, since these are the two times during the Mass when all the adults try to turn their full attention to the priest.